The "T" Word

I thought I would never have to use it, but push has come to shove, and a tornado of circumstances has carried me to the edge: I'm considering the possibility of transferring.

In high school when I was thinking about which college to go to, I had a lot of options. Since my dad is a professor at SBU, which is part of a :club: called the Coalition of Christian Colleges and Universities, I could go to any college that was a member of the CCCU free of tuition. While this was definitely a blessing, upon further examination of the schools on the list, I found that most of them were very small, several with less than 1,000 undergraduates, and therefore had a limited selection of majors. In other words, they just weren't very appealing to me, since I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life and was looking for more possibilities and opportunities. As such, I began looking at colleges outside of the "free" list.

I became intrigued by Samford. When I first visited Samford, I was overwhelmed by its awesomeness: the students and professors were so nice and the campus was so great and Birmingham was so cool and Samford had basically every majror in which I had ever expressed any interest. I got a decent deal: a good music scholarship, an academic scholarship, and planned on a music and geography double major. I was finally getting the heck outta Dodge. My future seemed to be lining up smoothly.

The first semester happened. I didn't enjoy being a music major at all. I was only doing it for the scholarship money, and I had no plans whatsoever to go into a music career. So, I relieved myself of the music major, lost the scholarship, and continued with geography.

Then it smacked me in the face again, as it has many times before: I don't know what I want to do with my life. So here I am paying through the nose for a geography degree that I don't even know what I'm going to do with. Suddenly Samford doesn't seem like the good deal that it once was.

Don't get me wrong. I love it here. Yes, I have had some adjustment issues, but regardless, I still love the people and the campus and my classes. The thought of transferring is heartbreaking.

I have so many fiddly doubts, worries, and questions.

"Where will I even go? What will I study when I get there? If I go, will I have wasted an entire year's worth of time, money, and effort here at Samford?

Yet again, I am failing to trust God. That has got to change. Now.